When former Vermont Governor Howard Dean, MD, appeared on the national radar in early 2003, I was hooked. "The Guv" was and is a rare bird: an intelligent, moderate Democrat who saw clearly how America's potential was slipping away, and would not mince words in saying so. Dean led the rest of the candidate field in saying the Iraq War was a colossal blunder that had made us less safe.

And for his honesty and accuracy, Governor Dean was subjected to vicious character assassination. The most effective attacks came from other Democrats (one in particular now runs Barack Obama's campaign). That's politics as usual, of course--I actually do understand that.

I'm a political science student, not a computer scientist as you might have guessed. I had been active in issue campaigns previously, but this was my first foray into electoral politics. I volunteered like mad. I went to and later organized huge Dean for America meetups here in Boulder. I traveled to Des Moines, Iowa to knock on doors and support The Guv in the crucial caucuses. (And I stood drunk at the end, twenty feet away from Governor Dean that fateful night after our loss when he worked so hard to buoy our spirits and was rewarded by a heavily edited clip from a crowd-dampening microphone that became "The Scream." Those of us who were actually there read about it for the first time the next morning, and assumed CNN and Fox had literally invented it.)

I kept on. I worked for other campaigns. I knocked on doors every weekend. I wrote hundreds of letters to undecided voters. I held signs speaking truth to power on busy intersections for several Sundays. I lead hundreds of people in our local DFA group, and helped to create a spectacularly effective Colorado PAC known as Democracy for Colorado, which I still support fully.

I worked my way up in the local Party as needs arose. I did GOTV for most of University Hill here in Boulder, and was re-elected as Precinct Captain for my neighborhood. I volunteered and voted at county reorgs, House District assemblies, and the State Convention twice. I got to know a lot of good people, and several State Senators, Reps, and CDP officers now recognize my face. Conversely, I can now recite the district, name, hometown, and other details about any Colorado politician you can find.

I sat in Mark Udall's office twice (and may do so again this week, if Ramona and Darwin don't mind me being arrested.) I wrote scads of fruitless letters and made polite phone calls to Senator Salazar, usually just encouraging him not to vote with the Republicans on a given issue. I maintained clean bulk email lists totalling 10,000 Coloradans, and blogged and blogged and blogged. I gave every dime I had to a variety of progressive candidates. And my family soon grew to expect not to see me much on weekends, as I knocked on doors around the County and elsewhere with all the energy I had.

In the end, I was wrong.

Democrats aren't interested in stopping the Iraq War. They just aren't.

Even in liberal Boulder, our Democratic Party has failed to pass any significant resolution opposing the Iraq War or calling for troop reductions. And the new Democratic majorities in the U.S. Senate and Congress are just happy to have their sinecures.

Of the three top-tier Democratic candidates for President, one is more hawkish than many Republicans in her desire to keep the Halliburton contracts flowing, and is unapologetic about her role in nearly ruining our economy and reputation. One has hired all the usual cynical operatives and positions himself as a slightly less cranky Joe Lieberman, claiming that his own Party is the still problem despite the fact that an historic majority of Americans support Democrats' broad policy initiatives by a wide margin. Maybe he's right, but it's an evil campaign apparatus he sits atop. And one is saying all the right things and is correctly focused on the growing socioeconomic divide as our highest domestic priority. But I don't trust him farther than I can throw him--I've read his book and I know how he voted in the Senate.

Politics is the art of compromise. That I chose to work hard for Salazar for Senate, and that I studiously refrained from criticizing him in public, ought to be proof that I understand that.

But no one ever looked back on his or her life and said, "I wish I hadn't spent so much time with my children."

And the one litmus-test issue I've held on to for four years is requiring honesty about the Iraq War, and a sincere commitment to make it stop.

That's where the Democratic Party parts company with me.

So from now on, I'll be putting my energies into other things that actually could help those who need help, like local food drives, homeless shelters, and inspiring skyshot efforts like One Laptop Per Child.

There will be more volunteers, and good for them. Really. But as of now I've joined the fastest-growing Party in the United States: Unaffiliated.

As it says in the Pearl Jam [1] song:

I am a patriot
and I love my country
Because my country is all I know
I wanna be with my family
People who understand me
I got no place else to go...
I am a patriot...
...
And I ain't no communist
And I ain't no socialist
And I ain't no capitalist
And I ain't no imperialist
And I'm no longer a democrat
I sure as f--k ain't no republican either
I only know one party,and that is freedom